Ask Pit—March 14, 2014

Jeff Pitman is the current Strength and Conditioning coach at Boise State University. His advice column "Ask Pit" is not yet syndicated.

Pit, what should I wear when I lift? Jason, Boise, ID

You don't want to wear clothes that restrict your range-of-motion or that can become a hindrance to your technique. I'd suggest that this would be appropriate gym wear:

Does groaning and grunting really help guys get the weight off the floor? E., Boise, ID

No, but it does help you get the weight off your trachea.

Pit, I heard you can stand in a bucket and lift yourself off the floor. How? Doug, Garden City, ID

Okay, so basically what you're doing is an upright row but with one small modification—ignoring Newton's third law of motion. Just put it out of your mind...Newton had really puny lats anyway.

Do you have a workout buddy? Greg, San Antonio, TX

WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPLY?!

What are your thoughts on CrossFit? Jackie, Olympia, WA

My thoughts on CrossFit are twofold:
1) If you can do 50 kipping pull-ups and 5 regular pull-ups, you can do FIVE PULL-UPS!

2) A lot of trainers are realizing the overall health benefits of a varied weight and cardio circuit that confuses the muscles and gets participants to max heart rate in a shorter period of time using high-intensity intervals. In other words, I don't care for it. Pick up that anvil, now!

Do you have any pets? Brian, Burley, ID

Meet "Princess"

Whats your favorite "treat"? Casey, Boise, ID

Hey, I'm only human (mostly)...and I have a sweet tooth just like everyone else. On "cheat days" I allow myself a bullion cube (or three, am I right?)

Have you competed in the World's strongest Man contest? Kelsie, Jackson Hole, WY

I have not competed, but I have always admired the Scandinavian anaerobic philosophy of "Løfte skøre ting". This Spring I had the Husafell Stone flown in from Iceland to use as a paper weight and each 5:45 AM workout of winter conditioning, I had the players pull school buses full of children from the village through the shipyard.

What's your favorite inspirational quote? Dee, Meridian, ID

A wise man once said:

I could have killed ‘em all, I could kill you. In town you’re the law, out here it’s me. Don’t push it. Don’t push it or I’ll give you a war you won’t believe. Let it go. Let it go.

That wise man's name was John Rambo.

—Pit Viper

If you'd like to "Ask Pit" a question or solicit advice on life, love or lifting, submit your queries to tips@obnug.com

"Ask Pit" is satire and for the amusement of Bronco Nation. Hopefully, admitting as much should shield us from litigation and/or having to run decks.