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NFL Mock Draft: Boise State homer version

When Drew and I put our heads together, there is no limit to our Boise State homerism. This fact will be obvious when you feast your eyes on our 2011 NFL Mock Draft. We predicted the first 15 picks of tomorrow night's first round (Drew took the evens, I took the odds), and if the draft goes anything like we've envisioned, Bronco fans will be in for a treat. Let's get drafty.

No. 1 - Carolina Panthers - Jarvis Hodge, RB, Boise State Broncos

Little known fact: There are a lot of former Toledo players in the NFC South, so even though experts expect Cam Newton to go No. 1 overall, the prudent move for the CarPants would be to draft Jarvis Hodge, Destroyer of MAC Safeties.


No. 2 - Denver Broncos - Mike Coughlin, QB, Boise State Broncos

Given Coughlin's propensity for backing up legendary, squeaky-clean quarterbacks, the Denver Broncos seem like a great fit. This of course, assumes that Tim Tebow will remain the starter and that Kyle Orton's neckbeard doesn't grant him any magical powers before the season.

No. 3 - Buffalo Bills - Titus Young, WR, Boise State Broncos

The Bills are always in the market for some big-play, flashy players, mostly because having Harvard-educated, bearded Ryan Fitzpatrick as your quarterback automatically docks you several hundred cool points. There exists a very real possibility that Young will have an extended holdout because, in the inevitable words of Young's Twitter feed, "Buffalo is da HAM. #freetitusyoung"

No. 4 - Cincinnati Bengals - J.P. Nisby, DT, Boise State Broncos

Nisby was kicked off the team last week for a no-holds-barred brawl at a local watering hole. The Bengals seem to like this sort of thing.

No. 5 - Arizona Cardinals - David Augusto, journalist, Middle Earth

Morale and massage trains.

No. 6 - Cleveland Browns - Sean King, TE, Boise State

Cleveland has a thing for Drew Carey and King is the closest thing we have to Drew Carey.

Sean_carey_medium
See what I mean?

No. 7 - San Francisco 49ers - Nathan Enderle, QB, Idaho

The thought here is that San Fran would take Enderle to serve as a very inferior backup to former No. 1 overall pick Alex Smith, in order to boost Smith's confidence and maybe possibly turn him into not a gigantic failure. A similar strategy the Niners hope to employ: Scheduling Pitt.

No. 8 - Tennessee Titans - Shiloh Keo, SS, Idaho

I've heard that Nashville has some amazing spare ribs. Keo's been looking for some spare ribs since this happened.

No. 9 - Dallas Cowboys - Austin Pettis, WR, Boise State

You can never have too many wide receivers, especially when one of them is Roy Williams.

No. 10 - Washington Redskins - Winston Venable, NB, Boise State

Let's be honest. Washington could use all the nickels it can get. Dimes and quarters even.

No. 11 - Houston Texans - TRADE with San Francisco

The San Francisco 49ers may trade back into the first round to draft Nevada QB Colin Kaepernick once they find out that Nathan Enderle has abused the pre-draft buffet circuit and must be moved to offensive tackle. The Niners hope that Kaepernick's lack of true quarterback skills will make Alex Smith feel better about life.

In this trade scenario, the Houston Texans would receive San Francisco's 2011 second round pick, San Francisco's 2012 first round pick, and they would get David Carr back even though they didn't ask for him.

No. 12 - Minnesota Vikings - Techno Viking, god, Valhalla

 

No. 13 - Detroit Lions - Doug Martin, RB, Boise State

The Lions may employ the oft-overlooked NFL Draft loophole of "dibs" to ensure the services of Martin when he becomes eligible in 2012. In the meantime, Detroit would be allowed to use parts of Brock Forsey, Ian Johnson, and Jeremy Avery to build a composite running back who can score touchdowns (Forsey), knit (Johnson), and fit through jail bars (Avery).

No. 14 - St. Louis Rams - Janoris Jenkins, DB, Florida

Steve Spagnuolo LOVES to blitz. Janoris Jenkins LOVES to get blitzed. This is a match made in heaven.

No. 15 - Miami Dolphins - Gene Bleymaier, athletic director, Boise State

The Dolphins could use a shot in the arm from an executive who thinks outside the box. And what better outside-the-boxer than Bleymaier? First order of business: Make the Dolphins a publicly traded company ... in Qatar. Second, show all the team's games on FOX Sports Miami and the Oprah Channel. Third, paint the field a different color. The NFL may have passed a rule about no non-green fields, but they didn't say anything about midfield logos that span goalline to goalline. Outside-the-box enough for you?

Your turn - No. 16 - Jacksonville Jaguars - Who will you pick?

Jeron Johnson is still on the board. Ryan Winterswyk is still on the board. Robb Akey is considering eating the board. Share your pick in the comments.