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New Year's resolutions

Eye of the liger.
Eye of the liger.

It's that time of year again. The beginning part. That means we get to lay 2010 to rest and focus on a brand new decade full of brand new opportunities. In retrospect, 2010 was pretty sweet, but that doesn't mean 2011 can't be even sweeter. So, after the jump, let's start making some New Year's resolutions Bronco's the only way we'll get rid of that spare tire before swimsuit season.

My turn

1) Rewrite all my Vandal jokes...replace "Idaho" with "New Mexico". 

2) See if those Inception guys can extract the Nevada game from my subconscious. 

3) Hide the phone numbers of all Bronco assistant coaches. 

4) See what the sport "basket ball" is all about. 

5) Look back wistfully at memories of Robb Akey's mustache. 

6) See if football team is accepting 30 year-old walk-ons. 

7) Now that he's graduated, start peeling my life-sized Sean King Fathead off my office wall. 

8) Obsess about Bronco football both night and day (same resolution as last year). 

9) Try to market line of Kellen Moore imaginary pistols. 

10) Stay at least 100 yards away from Doug Martin at all times. 

11) Short-sheet Chris Ault's bed. 

12) Prank call Nathan Enderle. Ask him if his refrigerator is running. If he says, "yes"...tell him he's about to be sacked. 

13) Start writing fresh hyperbole to describe Jeremy Ioane

14) Successfully patent hand-graft technique. Use Austin Pettis donor hands on recipient Geraldo Hiwat

15) Get used to defending a different mediocre conference. 

16) Travel to mountains of Tibet to consult with football gods. Ask what I did to tick them off last year. 

17) Construct even better Bronco Stadium Jumbotron out of Lite Brites™

18) Formally retract that "white helmet" hoax that we started. 

19) Travel to Moscow, steal top secret Kibbie Dome plans...use to build gardening shed in back yard. 

20) Figure out how I can be paid royalties every time someone mentions 2005 Georgia loss between now and 2011 opener. Early retirement by September. 

21) Browse craigslist for decommissioned Soviet satellite as it may be the only way I'm going to get to see the MTN network this year. 

22) Write more awesome OBNUG articles under pen name "Kevan Lee".


Your turn

in the comments section, go ahead and lay out your own New Year's resolutions. 2011 is going to be epic(ish).