Dear esteemed Heisman Trophy voters and Craig James,
It is with great humility and reverence and possibly even bribe money if that's what you're into that I come before you and ask that you give the Heisman Trophy for college football's most outstanding player to Kellen Moore, college football's most outstanding player. Also, I would like to be a Heisman voter next year, but we can talk about that later.
I am fully aware that the voting is over, the ballots are counted, and you all think Cam Newton is the cat's pajamas. But if I've learned anything from watching ABC Family's 25 Days of Christmas movie marathon, it is to never give up and always believe in miracles. No Nevada jokes!
So please hear my 11th hour plea. Kellen Moore is the most outstanding player in college football. He is prolific, talented, hard-working, classy, and admirable. He is everything you want in a Heisman Trophy winner and so much more.
Also, Bronco fans could really use a solid right about now.
What do you say?
Earlier this month, I made a semi-eloquent argument for giving the Heisman to Moore. Allow myself to plagiarize myself:
... more often than not, it takes a little something extra to put a player over the top. Mark Ingram had his role on a number 1 team. Sam Bradford was the perfect college and pro QB. Tim Tebow was born of a virgin.
Kellen Moore's calling card? He shouldn't even be in the running.
When a player as unique and extraordinary as Moore comes along, we simply must sit back and take notice. What he has done this year defies today's college football. Imagine Steve Kerr having his way in the NBA, taking Kobe Bryant to school, dunking on Dwight Howard, putting LeBron's Decision to shame. A Steve Kerr clone as the NBA's next Michael Jordan is just as likely as a six-foot-nothing lefty pocket passer turning today's college football on its head.
And it's not like my nailing the 95 Theses onto the door of a webzine was even necessary. Kellen Moore's play speaks for itself.
You like numbers? Here you go.
245-for-345, 3,506 yards, 33 TDs, 5 INTs, 71% completion, 185.4 passer rating
You like leadership?
Try a one-loss season where he made every play there was to be made.
You like left-handed people?
Me, too. Neil Armstrong is the balls.
And if the on-field product is not enough to sway your vote to Moore, let me whine and dine you with how important this award is for Bronco Nation.
Boise State fans have had a long year. Don't get me wrong, it's been filled with a lot of historic highs and memorable moments. All the while, though, we've been on trial, and we've witnessed our team's perception shift from underdog favorite to despised scum of the earth.
A typical week in the life of Kevan Lee, Bronco fan, involves most of the following: flame wars, incessant quality-of-win debates, anxiety, being called a jagweed, strength of schedule arguments, Mark May reminding me that I'm 1/3 as valuable as a normal person, flame wars with Oregon fans, Dairy Queen Blizzard, haters, big win over a WAC team, more haters, and hey TCU has jumped us in the polls.
It's been draining to defend the Broncos week in and week out. And the payoff - a spot in the national championship at best, the Rose Bowl at worst - never came.
This Heisman Trophy ceremony is now the top of the mountain for Bronco fans.
I don't ask for much, only that you take back all your votes for Cam Newton and Andrew Luck, disregard LaMichael James as a system running back, choose Kellen Moore as the first unanimous Heisman winner in history, and keep Jared Zabransky from starting the "Boise! ... State!" cheer a la Billy Sims' "Boomer Sooner" from two years ago. That's all.
I'd really appreciate it. And so would my friends Mr. Washington and Mr. Lincoln.