Dear Utah State mascot,
Please, for the love of all that is good and holy, do not come to the Boise State - Utah State game tomorrow. There will be children there. And Paul J. Schneider.
Ps. Someone sent us some pictures of you, and we haven't been able to sleep since. What ARE you doing with that kid?! And a wheelchair-stricken old man? He can't even walk, Utah State mascot! Leave him alone!