Melvin "Inky" Marsh here again with a real scoop: Boise State football has returned. Here are some observations so you don't feel like a dumb egg.
No looky loos
The Broncos are known to keep tight-lipped about goings on down at the sawmill, but they've ramped up their strict "no looky loo" policy and turned everyone without a press pass away at the door. Luckily, mine's always neatly tucked into the hat band of my Panama—as it has been since the Dempsey-Willard massacre in 1919. A couple of ne'er-do-wells thought they'd get an eyeful of the first Spring practice of the year this A.M., but when security came round, the fellas said "let's blouse" and high-tailed it for the exits!
The least important position on the field
Hear a lot of writers beating their gums about the importance of the quarterback position...but I say "tell that to Sweeney!" I don't cotton to the forward pass much, so I think the wingbacks are the bread and butter of the offense, but JoJo Southwick can earn his peanuts if he can figure out how to punt. There's a position that's the cat's particulars!
Lilliputian wingback a true titan of the turf
Shane Williams-Rhodes may be a little fella, but when he gets the gears going he really hits on all sixes! I saw him take a lateral from Southwick, deftly sidestep an end who was intent on giving him the business and take the pigskin at least 200 feet up the sideline (if there are any Canadians about, they may be able to tell you how many meters that works out to).
Brits are about
The defensive line looks like it's in good hands this year, especially with Sir Elliot Hoyte about! It's my understanding the big tackle is on loan from her majesty and ma'am, we thank you! Some don't think American football is built for the Brits, but they really did us Doughboys a solid during The Spring Offensive—I'd share a trench with one any day!
Quite a show
I hear rumor that the "Video Entertainment Board" at the north end of the football arena is to be replaced this year, but I can't understand why. Personally, I'd charge patrons at least a nickel apiece and open up the stadium during the week to show the latest talkies. There's a real money maker!
Great reverence shown for Bronco Big Cheese
As practice waned, a hush fell over the assembled onlookers as "Old Dutch" Petersen sauntered onto the pitch. Dressed in a smart-looking dull gray sweatshirt and pants and with a whistle around his neck, the old ball coach really commanded the respect of his impressionable troops. You can tell through their attentive stares that they think "Pete" (as they call him) is nothing short of the Duck's Quack.
More to come
Position battles began in earnest this day and many of them promise to be closer than a Burma Shave. I'll make sure to keep you gals and fellas abreast of the latest goings on until I'm told to vamoose. For now, I hope you enjoyed my first full day on the job as much as I did. Remember, I'll be on the twitter machine (@MelvinMarsh) as long as I can generate the wattage.
The Melvin Q. Marsh Minute
Throughout Spring ball, I'll be putting together a radio program for One Bronco Nation Under God that you can listen to on your RCA or other radio device. Since Spring Camp is just underway, we're re-releasing a classic Melvin Q. Marsh Minute from the Bronco's glorious past. Give a listen, won't you...it really is just over a minute...not like that so-called "Five Minute Podcast". What a bunch of baloney!
(click to play)