When Joe Southwick went down with an ankle injury in the first quarter of last weekend's Nevada game, most Broncos—even the ones that have refused to acknowledge that Joe Southwick is more than an average QB—allowed just a little bit of pee to come out. Boise State's offense promptly stalled against what we were told would be a pushover Nevada D and right on cue, the defense started to allow Kendall Brock to run freely, with no fear of decapitation. Our season was over, right? Well, beyond the already UNACCEPTABLE two losses, that is. Then backup Grant Hedrick got loose for a 50-yard gain, Jay Ajayi remembered he was a touchdown-scoring murderbeast and the Broncos dispatched the Wolf Pack with relative ease.
After the game, the hyperbole started. Hedrick was our savior. "Better than Southwick", they shouted. "Now our offense can REALLY go". "Fire Robert Prince" (oops, that quote was from after the UW game and it was likely said by me). Whatever the postgame chatter, one thing was clear: nobody knew our backup QB's name.
Now, your immediate reaction may be to correct the seemingly 75% of people that get Mr. Hedrick's name wrong...but stop and think of the incredible long con that's actually being perpetrated right now, that WE can be a part of. With less than a whole game tape and spotty relief duty, Grant Hedrick doesn't provide a lot of film to examine, but Grant Hendricks has virtually none at all—if we carry this through to its logical conclusion, GRAHAM HENDRICKS provides ZERO game film, whatsoever. It is imperative that teams start prepping for Graham Hendricks, the slow-footed pocket passer who telegraphs all his throws—just take my word for it.
What else do we know about Graham Hendricks?
- He's no relation to Bronco legend Bart Hendricks but his cousin's friend's aunt lived next to Jeff Rowe.
- The read option is not an option. Graham Hendricks doesn't even have a library card.
- Graham Hendricks owns every instructional DVD in the "Hal Mumme" collection.
- Graham Hendricks lost a footrace to Matt Paradis.
- Graham Hendricks LOVES bubble screens.
- Graham Hendricks thinks Kirby Moore has a strong throwing motion.
- Graham Hendricks owns an autographed poster of Nathan Enderle.
- Graham Hendricks will definitely be getting the start against BYU.
So, as sad as it is that Southwick's senior season was cut short—all (that means you, opposing defensive coordinators) should hail the arrival of Graham Hendricks. He may be slow, predictable and weak...but he's our starting QB and we'll back him all the way (and then heckle him mercilessly at the Whole Foods).