The latest edition of EA Sports NCAA Football video game franchise will hit store shelves on Tuesday, which just so happens to coincide with one of my sick days. How convenient.
The college football sim is a great way to while away the hours until real football starts up again in a month or so. It's also a great way to see how the powers-that-be at EA Sports view the Boise State football roster. Join me after the jump for a breakdown of each player's overall rating and some bonus info on several Boise State players. Did Kellen Moore crack the coveted 99 rating? Did Doug Martin's thighs get a 99 in girth? Why is Chris Potter a ginger? This and more after the jump.
To cull the player ratings from the Boise State roster, I used the EA Sports Teambuilder feature, which allows you to create any team you want and import it into the game. You can populate your made-up team with the roster of a current team, like Boise State's (if you want your team to be good) or Idaho's (if you hate yourself). Here is the Boise State roster:
Note: Player ratings are per EA Sports and are wholly dependent on the whims of their roster-scrubbing robot. As such, you see Jimmy Pavel as an 84 OVR kicker and the only kicker on the roster. Boy is he in for a surprise.
Kellen Moore earns a 98. Intern, bring me my righteous indignation!
I thought for sure that Moore would earn the golden 99 rating this year, but alas, it wasn't meant to be. Guess I'll go write some angry letters to some people. At least EA raised his 96 from last season's game. Can two rating points really capture the maturity and all-around improvement that Moore made from last offseason to this? Apparently.
Moore received stellar marks across the board for passing, and a 76 speed score for running. That is as fast as Boise State receiving tight end Gabe Linehan, which is probably not that big of a deal but also maybe a little embarrassing for Linehan.
Moore's rank among the college football elite QBs? Not too shabby, but I will probably end up making some unkind accusations in my aforementioned angry letter.
- Andrew Luck - 99
- Landry Jones - 94
- Denard Robinson - 91
- Ryan Lindley - 92
- Case Keenum - 95
On a hilarious related note, Idaho's best quarterback is token QB No. 14 with a rating of 73, which is lower than the ratings for the Vandal punter and kicker and at least 10 other guys. Oh, Idaho football. Never stop being you.
Matt Kaiserman lives!
The EA Sports roster must have been created months ago before Mike Coughlin graduated and J.P. Nisby punched a guy and Matt Kaiserman retired from football. Those players still exist on the video game Boise State roster, which is great news for those players' video-game addicted nephews. And as a bonus, EA Sports has the ability to heal. Matt Kaiserman's injury rating is an 88 (the closer to 100, the less injury-prone you are), which if we're being honest with ourselves is closer to 50 in all actuality. Also, EA Sports has the ability to grant insane widow's peaks, as evidenced by the above picture.
Change Doug Martin's strength rating before someone gets hurt
Martin earned a 73 on the rating scale for strength. His awareness rating is 93, so you can be sure he is aware that EA Sports blows at making accurate strength ratings.
This year's unidentifiable Boise State player
With every NCAA video game release, there is at least one player who defies the bounds of definition. Two years ago it was a string bean with undiagnosed anemia. Last year it was Norelco beard Richie Brockel. This year? Terence Howard with receding cornrows:
I was great in Iron Man 30 years ago, right?
Good heavens, what have they done to Troy Ware?
The worst player on the Boise State roster is wide receiver Troy Ware, whose 57 overall rating is the only one on the team under 60. His catch ratings are only slightly better than Michael Atkinson's, he has zero stamina, and his awareness rating is such that you may need to point him in the right direction before every play. Troy Ware is terrible. Oh, and he's now a white dude.
This makes ginger Chris Potter look so much better by comparison.
Billy Winn got robbed, and other observations
- Winn's overall score is an 87, which is two points fewer than Tyrone Crawford and six points fewer than Thomas Byrd. Serenity now! (I take video games way too seriously.)
- Dextrell Simmons does not appear on the Bronco roster ... because video games are for sissies? I don't know, but I think that might be the excuse Simmons makes.
- I mentioned above that Jimmy Pavel is Boise State's placekicker. Other depth chart assumptions to be made include Trevor Harman as punter, Travis Stanaway at safety, and Chuck Hayes and Brenel Myers on the offensive line.
- Tyler Shoemaker is a 90. HT: Shoemaker's cousin who works for EA Sports.
- Jeremy Ioane is a 69. I will add this to my letter.
- Jeff Worthy is the only Boise State incoming freshman who appears on the roster, probably by some very convenient accident. Worthy is a 65, which means he's almost ambulatory.
See the full Boise State roster
Head over to EA Sports' TeamBuilder page to build your own Bronco team and get a look at the full ratings for each Bronco player. Make a weekend of it like I will.
Do you think EA Sports did the Broncos right with their ratings? Should Kellen Moore have been a 98? Should Billy Winn have been at least a 90? Anything else you want me to add to my angry letter? Share your thoughts in the comments.