Professor Mayhem is here to give you statistics and facts for your favorite football team. As a certified mathematician and numerologist, I will help decypher things for you to increase your understandings of college football. Join me, please, for a magic journey to the land of knowledge.
Were you aware-
Kellen Moore has lost two games as a starting quarterback in college football. That is equal to the numbers on his jesey when added together.
Kellen Moore is left handed. Other famous people who are or were left handed include people who all wish they were Kellen Moore.
Doug Martin can bench press 400 pounds. 400 pounds of ribs is a lot of delicious ribs, more than I can eat.
Speaking of barbeque, did you know that famous humanitarian William Tecumsah Sherman brought the secrets of cooking with open flame with him to Georgia? They have never forgotten his generous gift.
Georgia has struggled in football in the past few years. This is due to being invaded by Russia.
Geogia's mascot is the Bulldog. Bulldogs are famous for their ugly faces and having short lives due to too much inbreeding.
Georgia is excited about their freshman running back. This is because there is a law prohibiting running backs from playing a full career at Geogia. It is called the Herschel Walker Law. It was later also passed by the city of Dallas.
Speaking of Dallas, TCU is near there. TCU's mascot is the Horned Frog. It spits wine from it's eyes as a defensive mechanism.
The Boise State/TCU game was moved to Boise. TCU thinks this is because they are leaving the MWC. This is untrue. It was done because nobody wants to go to Texas.
It is illegal to sell alcohol in parts of Texas. This is one of the reasons nobody wants to go to Texas.
Some people think TCU joined the Big East to run away from playing BSU every year. This is also untrue. It was done so TCU could run towards playing UCONN every year.
UCONN has played in as many Fiesta Bowls as TCU. They also both have the same record.
Geraldo Boldewjyin changed his name from Hiwat to make it easier to spell. It is still pronounced the same.
Billy Winn's nickname when playing Risk is William the Conquerer.
The Blue gets it's distinctive color from the tears of visiting teams.
Boise State has the winningest record in college football in the past 11 years. This stat is awesome.
Nevada is one of two teams to beat Boise State with Kellen Moore as quarterback. Prostitution is legal in Nevada. These two things are not related.
I hope you have enoyed your statistical learnings as much as I have enjoyed teaching them to you. See you soon, Bronco fans.