NFL Mock Draft: Boise State homer version
When Drew and I put our heads together, there is no limit to our Boise State homerism. This fact will be obvious when you feast your eyes on our 2011 NFL Mock Draft. We predicted the first 15 picks of tomorrow night's first round (Drew took the evens, I took the odds), and if the draft goes anything like we've envisioned, Bronco fans will be in for a treat. Let's get drafty.
No. 1 - Carolina Panthers - Jarvis Hodge, RB, Boise State Broncos
Little known fact: There are a lot of former Toledo players in the NFC South, so even though experts expect Cam Newton to go No. 1 overall, the prudent move for the CarPants would be to draft Jarvis Hodge, Destroyer of MAC Safeties.
No. 2 - Denver Broncos - Mike Coughlin, QB, Boise State Broncos
Given Coughlin's propensity for backing up legendary, squeaky-clean quarterbacks, the Denver Broncos seem like a great fit. This of course, assumes that Tim Tebow will remain the starter and that Kyle Orton's neckbeard doesn't grant him any magical powers before the season.
No. 3 - Buffalo Bills - Titus Young, WR, Boise State Broncos
The Bills are always in the market for some big-play, flashy players, mostly because having Harvard-educated, bearded Ryan Fitzpatrick as your quarterback automatically docks you several hundred cool points. There exists a very real possibility that Young will have an extended holdout because, in the inevitable words of Young's Twitter feed, "Buffalo is da HAM. #freetitusyoung"
No. 4 - Cincinnati Bengals - J.P. Nisby, DT, Boise State Broncos
Nisby was kicked off the team last week for a no-holds-barred brawl at a local watering hole. The Bengals seem to like this sort of thing.
No. 5 - Arizona Cardinals - David Augusto, journalist, Middle Earth
Morale and massage trains.
No. 6 - Cleveland Browns - Sean King, TE, Boise State
Cleveland has a thing for Drew Carey and King is the closest thing we have to Drew Carey.
No. 7 - San Francisco 49ers - Nathan Enderle, QB, Idaho
The thought here is that San Fran would take Enderle to serve as a very inferior backup to former No. 1 overall pick Alex Smith, in order to boost Smith's confidence and maybe possibly turn him into not a gigantic failure. A similar strategy the Niners hope to employ: Scheduling Pitt.
No. 8 - Tennessee Titans - Shiloh Keo, SS, Idaho
I've heard that Nashville has some amazing spare ribs. Keo's been looking for some spare ribs since this happened.
No. 9 - Dallas Cowboys - Austin Pettis, WR, Boise State
You can never have too many wide receivers, especially when one of them is Roy Williams.
No. 10 - Washington Redskins - Winston Venable, NB, Boise State
Let's be honest. Washington could use all the nickels it can get. Dimes and quarters even.
No. 11 - Houston Texans - TRADE with San Francisco
The San Francisco 49ers may trade back into the first round to draft Nevada QB Colin Kaepernick once they find out that Nathan Enderle has abused the pre-draft buffet circuit and must be moved to offensive tackle. The Niners hope that Kaepernick's lack of true quarterback skills will make Alex Smith feel better about life.
In this trade scenario, the Houston Texans would receive San Francisco's 2011 second round pick, San Francisco's 2012 first round pick, and they would get David Carr back even though they didn't ask for him.
No. 12 - Minnesota Vikings - Techno Viking, god, Valhalla
No. 13 - Detroit Lions - Doug Martin, RB, Boise State
The Lions may employ the oft-overlooked NFL Draft loophole of "dibs" to ensure the services of Martin when he becomes eligible in 2012. In the meantime, Detroit would be allowed to use parts of Brock Forsey, Ian Johnson, and Jeremy Avery to build a composite running back who can score touchdowns (Forsey), knit (Johnson), and fit through jail bars (Avery).
No. 14 - St. Louis Rams - Janoris Jenkins, DB, Florida
Steve Spagnuolo LOVES to blitz. Janoris Jenkins LOVES to get blitzed. This is a match made in heaven.
No. 15 - Miami Dolphins - Gene Bleymaier, athletic director, Boise State
The Dolphins could use a shot in the arm from an executive who thinks outside the box. And what better outside-the-boxer than Bleymaier? First order of business: Make the Dolphins a publicly traded company ... in Qatar. Second, show all the team's games on FOX Sports Miami and the Oprah Channel. Third, paint the field a different color. The NFL may have passed a rule about no non-green fields, but they didn't say anything about midfield logos that span goalline to goalline. Outside-the-box enough for you?
Your turn - No. 16 - Jacksonville Jaguars - Who will you pick?
Jeron Johnson is still on the board. Ryan Winterswyk is still on the board. Robb Akey is considering eating the board. Share your pick in the comments.
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As one of the few OBNUG readers that actually reside within the city limits of Jacksonville, I would have to cast the initial ballot for the the Draft pick here. While we have great options on the board, and numerous ways to go with this pick, We would have to draft Coach Pete with this selection. This would allow the Jags to move Del Rio over to Defensive coach, and let him do what he does best, i.e. make awkward faces for the TV cameras and say things like, “Ummm” and “Uhhhh”.
This move would allow Coach Pete to team up with Dirk Koetter. As we have seen in the past Coach Pete, working in conjunction with any other coach with a BSU background (Or likely pulse for that matter) can come up with some amazing play calling schemes.
While the GM might be tempted to trade this pick to the Broncos for Tim Tebow, or at least his left sock, the owner will go with Pete, and watch all of the average and mediocre players drafted in recent years reach new heights as the Jags “get more out of each of their players”, and “Do more with less”…
by AdaminFL on Apr 27, 2011 10:21 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
No. 17 - Oakland Raiders - Robb Akey
“Hey we hired the previous dUI coach and he sucked too!”
You cannot reason a man out of something he didn't reason himself into in the first place.
The sad thing is...Akey is twice the coach that Tom Cable was at UI
by Drew Roberts on Apr 27, 2011 10:39 AM PDT up reply actions
I know, I was going for pure, unadulterated snark
I’m petty like that…only when I have to be!
You cannot reason a man out of something he didn't reason himself into in the first place.
Wait, Akey = 2x Cable?
I guess so. After all he did win the greatest bowl game evah played.
You cannot reason a man out of something he didn't reason himself into in the first place.
by kcam on Apr 27, 2011 11:02 AM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
I think it easily surpassed "greatest bowl game ever" to become "greatest sporting moment of all time"
’07 Fiesta Bowl? Meh.
’82 Cal-Stanford? Pfft.
‘08 ’09 MPC Roady’s Udrove Humanitarian Bowl? Ding ding ding!
by Drew Roberts on Apr 27, 2011 11:18 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Alan Shephard, Moon's greatest golfer
This golf shot should vie for some sort of greatest sporting moment award. Hasn’t been replicated, and it takes an out-of-this-world athlete with astronomical spatial relations to accomplish this feat.
Didn’t we get a kick out of Harman at the spring game that came close to matching that golf shot?
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it. Maya Angelou
BSU changes the BCS! 2011
by boiseblues on Apr 27, 2011 9:03 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
..and to think, the dUI fan base buys into that clown. Too funny.
"Boise State football is now a Fargo winter. You know what's coming, and that information does you no good whatsoever". Matt James / The Fresno Bee
by blue4areason on Apr 28, 2011 6:03 AM PDT up reply actions
unadulterated snark
I like that. I also enjoyed the “drooling lackwit” on the Blue/Orange Debate, but my reply button has been balky lately. You’ve been nailin’ ’em, kcam.
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it. Maya Angelou
BSU changes the BCS! 2011
The whole Raider/dUI connection makes me wanna hurl.
"Boise State football is now a Fargo winter. You know what's coming, and that information does you no good whatsoever". Matt James / The Fresno Bee
by blue4areason on Apr 28, 2011 6:01 AM PDT up reply actions
You just HAD to go there din't you kcam?
Lol…..
"Boise State football is now a Fargo winter. You know what's coming, and that information does you no good whatsoever". Matt James / The Fresno Bee
by blue4areason on Apr 28, 2011 6:00 AM PDT up reply actions
Technoviking
I love that guy.
"Or, if boarding the bus is just too difficult for an Establishmentarian to do, get your snob school to schedule the Broncos home-and-home. Any takers?" - Pat Forde
"I don’t need a dictionary, I have an ipad, and an expensive large university education." - hrman7
by reflectivity on Apr 27, 2011 11:24 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs
Was that Akey's brother?
Technoviking. Nice find guys.
"Boise State football is now a Fargo winter. You know what's coming, and that information does you no good whatsoever". Matt James / The Fresno Bee
by blue4areason on Apr 28, 2011 6:09 AM PDT up reply actions
emmit's "mark draft" very funny too
"… There are so many times in life that you’re just extremely disappointed and depressed and in the tank and you still have to perform and you still have to rally and you still have to move forward and that’s, to me, the lesson right now. That’s true toughness when you can perform at your best when you just don’t feel like it." Coach Petersen Nov, 2010
Jarvis Hodge=BYOB
That’s all I gotta say.
"It takes no talent to give great effort" -Chris Petersen
"It's hard to imagine a more complete football team than Boise State" - Kirk Herbstreit
"Watch the point, catch the fat." - Larry Fitzgerald
Detriot has Jevon Best
The Muscle Hamster is better suited for the Steelers and their smash mouth football. Chris Ault to the Dallas Cowboys as coach. Jerry Jones & the Chris Ault that would be something. Austin Pettis to the Green Bay Packers – He would make a great Lambuea leaper after TD’s.
Based on the fact tha the Appeals Court denied the NFL appeals of the Lockout Injunction
ESPN’s egg heads (the NFL ones, not the ones that spit when they talk or spout nonsense when they open their open, while sitting next to Rece Davis, it would appear that Coughlin being a decent draft pick really isn’t out of the realm of possibilities. Unfortunately, it also means Mr. Ginger likely will also be a high draft pick….
I'd rather be surfing.
by Pac 10 Alum on Apr 27, 2011 7:23 PM PDT reply actions
YES
LIONS GET DOUG! LIONS GET DOUG! LIONS GET DOUG! LIONS GET DOUG!
My grandfather was a Packers fan, my father is a Vikings fan, I am a Lions fan, and there is no way in hell I am raising a Bears fan.
Oh, and I hate the Philadelphia Eagles
The lions appear to be headed in the right direction IMO.
I would like to see them get Doug. BTW, if it happens, that Sue in practice, just ignore him.
"Boise State football is now a Fargo winter. You know what's coming, and that information does you no good whatsoever". Matt James / The Fresno Bee
by blue4areason on Apr 28, 2011 6:13 AM PDT up reply actions

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