FanPost

If the BCS Ran the World

 

BCS DECLARES GERMANY WINNER OF WORLD WAR II; US RANKED 4th

   

BCS computers have recently been put to work on major contests other than football and today the BCS declared Germany to be the winner of World War II.

 

"Germany put together an incredible number of victories beginning with the annexation of Austria and the Sudetenland and continuing on into conference play with defeats of Poland,  France, Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Belgium, and the Netherlands. Their only losses came against the US and Russia; however considering their entire body  of work--including an incredibly tough Strength of Schedule--our computers deemed them worthy of the #1 ranking."

 

Questioned about the #4 ranking of the United States the BCS commissioner stated "The US only had two major victories--Japan and  Germany. The computer models, unlike humans, aren't influenced by head-to-head contests--they consider each contest to be only a single, equally-weighted  event."

 

German Chancellor Adolph Hitler said "Yes, we lost to the US; but we defeated #2 ranked France in only 6 weeks." Herr Hitler has been criticized for seeking dramatic victories to earn 'style points' to enhance Germany's rankings.  Hitler protested "Our contest with Poland was in doubt until the final day and the conditions in Norway were incredibly challenging and demanded the application  of additional forces."

 

The French ranking has also come under scrutiny. The BCS commented "France had a single loss against Germany and following a preseason #1 ranking they only fell to #2."

 

Japan was ranked #3 with victories including Manchuria, Borneo, Singapore and the Philippines.

 

This obviously didn't begin with me. After all I'm... nothing very clever

This content was not created by OBNUG and therefore may not meet our standards. On the contrary, it probably exceeds them.

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